Saturday, June 5, 2010

Brain Damage Advantage

The following words are from Laurie Michaels whom I will interview on July 6th. 

Inspiring is too small a word.

“Why did you do that?” “I don’t know, I’ve had brain surgery, I’m brain damaged!” “How could you forget that?” “I don’t know, I’ve had brain surgery, I’m brain damaged!” I can’t believe you said that! “I can’t believe I said that either, I’ve had brain surgery, I’m brain damaged!”What can you possibly say to that? There is no rebuttal to that!
It used to be “I should be back to normal by now.”, “I should be able to care for Ella by now.”, “I should be back to work by now.” Then I stopped “shoulding all over myself”. I realize, I have a golden ticket! I can get away with ANYTHING!!! “I’m brain damaged”, will probably curb your expectation’s of me. I have spent my whole life trying to prove how capable I am, that you can EXPECT great things from me. Now I am set free from your expectations….that’s extremely liberating! That’s what you call “brain damage advantage”.
I am celebrating my 1 year anniversary of my final brain surgery as of 4/16. I chose that as my date to celebrate because the final surgery got rid of my daily vomiting & debilitating daily headaches.
What have I learned? That “brain surgery recovery years” are like dog years…1 year seems like 7 years! I might have gotten “brain damaged” just enough to be “terminally happy”, or maybe I’m only cognitively aware of the good stuff and I am not aware of the bad stuff. Although, I think my inner circle would tell me if “I’m not quite right”. That’s a tough call…do ya tell somebody that they’re NOT completely with it, or let them live happily in their own world? In truth, I think maybe I have been at the bottom of the barrel & now I am just so grateful to have a life!
I do have a life…much more so than I used to. I spend quality time with my beautiful oompha loompahs (kids) every day. I hook up with my mom and take spiritual development classes. I also have a holistic chiropractor work his magic on me, and I push myself in physical therapy. I spend my time doing and being what I want. I am no longer the person I was before the brain surgeries. I refuse to compromise my life, the way I use to. Check yourself, before you wreck yourself! I think I have become a much more thoughtful, patient and present person. Which only time could lead me to.
I don’t think you get a free ride out of whatever you’re in, so you might as well find something positive that you can learn, and run with it. Then pay it forward to your loved ones. Live more juicy!

I feel I have been transformed through all the love, positive thoughts and prayers that have been sent my way. All that energy is so healing and I feel it! THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart! I just hope you will some day get the opportunity to experience the return, 10 fold!

1 comment:

  1. AnonymousJune 06, 2010

    Love is a funny thing. . . witnessing your self accepting inner dialog makes me smile!
    I know it well. Heads are important but HEARTS rule. Forward sister, move those mountains and molehills! ~ cheryl